Friday, June 28, 2002


I'm stuck in a rut. I can't seem to get my head around any project. Heck, I've lost motivation to even go to the gym (which I'm paying way to much to not be using). I need to get my shit in gear. Force myself to work on ad stuff for at least two hours a day, get my butt to the gym, etc. Depression sucks. Pretending everything is okay takes a lot of energy and when I'm alone again, I can't find the energy I need to motivate myself to do what I should. Well, that and I am a high-ranking procrastination queen. So that doesn't help either. Creatively I know I have been sensoring myself before I even get things to paper, which is tragic and a bad habit. I *have* to stop doing that. I just wish this queasy feeling in my stomach would go away. I have a feeling at the end of this unemployment phase of my life (if it ever ends, somedays it feels like I will forever be searching for a job) is going to give me an ulcer and turn all my hair grey. I was browsing through some ad quotes today from the "greats" in the biz, and it was inspiring. But apparently not enough to motivate. Dang. I should be heading out in about two I think I will make an effort to do some work.

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